68.点拨其心智,胜于助其回忆

68.点拨其心智,胜于助其回忆

点拨其心智,胜于助其回忆。前者需要思考,后者只需回忆。许多人不能在恰当的时候做恰当的事,只是因为他们一时未能想起来。在这种情况下,朋友的提醒可让他们看清事物的利弊。能审时度势、提供当下所需是人的一大天赋——缺少了它,许多事就无法继续。如果你有见事之明,就应为他人指点迷津。如果你没有,就请他人帮助你。前者你要慎重,后者你要急切。为人引路时须谨慎行事,点到即可。如果事关当事人的利益,而你已提醒他小心,则更需讲究这个技巧。一开始,你只需让他有所领悟;如果还不够,就应提供更多的信息。假使对方不以为然,你就应运用技巧让他赞同。很多事情没有结果,只是因为没有尝试罢了。

68.It is better to help with intelligence than with memory

It is better to help with intelligence than with memory. The latter needs only recollection, the former requires thought. Many persons omit what is appropriate to the moment because it does not occur to them; a friend's advice on such occasions may enable them to see the advantages. It is one of the greatest gifts of mind to be able to offer what is needed at the moment: for want of that many things fail to be performed. Share the light of your intelligence, when you have any, and ask for it when you have it not, the first cautiously, the last anxiously. Give no more than a hint: this finesse is especially needful when it touches the interest of him whose attention you awaken. You should give but a taste at first, and then pass on to more when that is not sufficient. If he thinks of No, go cleverly in search of Yes. Most things are not obtained simply because they are not attempted.